Recently I posted my experiences of the past week which were quite extraordinary: I snowmobiled, skied, raced go karts, snorkeled, rode ATVs and spoke twice for clients here in the U.S. and Mexico. Some of the recreational activities were around my work in Mexico.
A friend on Facebook commented, “Life is good!”
Yes, life is good. But the all fun activities of the week (an anomaly for me) weren’t what made life “good.”
Snowmobiling Rabbit Ears Pass at 10,000 feet was exciting, but spending time with close male friends and the fellowship we had were what made it good.
Skiing was fun and a good workout, but the inspiration of the mountains that deepened my reflection and creativity were what made it good.
Go kart racing was a blast, but doing something with both my boys that they love to do was what made it good.
ATV riding and snorkeling in Mexico were a treat, but getting to know my client and some audience members better made it good.
Aldous Huxley said, “Experience is not a matter of having actually swum the Hellenspont, or danced with the dervishes, or slept in a doss-house. It is a matter of sensibility and intuition, of seeing and hearing the significant things, of paying attention at the right moments, of understanding and coordinating. Experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him.”
In the same vein, what makes life good isn’t so much what happens to us as it is what we do with what happens to us; good comes from the lessons we learn, the meaning we extract and the relationships we deepen.
The past week was fun and enjoyable with all the things I was fortunate to do, but that isn’t what made life good. Life is good all the time if we learn to focus on what is truly significant and lasting in the ordinary and extraordinary events of each day.
Good words Mark…It’s good to see you taking the time with your family and focusing on the significant. It’s easy with our schedules to not “pay attention at the right moments.”
I got to spend a few extra days days in Mexico (Playa Del Carmen) a few weeks ago, too!
BTW – I just bought a cd from Lucy Swindoll (sister of Chuck) upon request of my loving sister…Have you heard of Lucy? REALLY inspirational speaker…what a pro. Anyway – her first point was to SAVOR the moments. Really hit home for me. Totally connects the dots with your message. Maybe the big man in the sky is trying to tell me something.
I remember when I was stationed in Italy flying stressful missions into Serbia how on my rare days off I would hike into the woods of the Italian Alps. I used to savor the moments…really appreciating the amazing beauty and the peace in light of the fear and uncertainty of the situation I was in. When the peace can be taken away, we appreciate it a lot more.
Yes – Life is good. Lots to be thankful for. I appreciate your friendship and wingmanship Mark.
Waldo
Mark, I ran across you books yesterday at the local Bookstore yesterday and was impressed with your insight to leadership. I recently was laid off (the 3rd time in 6 years) and was seeking some form of insight to what it all meant for me. I have always been a positive and focused individual that practiced the “push them up” style of management in every position I have had the pleasure to serve in. I even joked to some of my colleges that the VP title I was given referred to “versatile person”. You hit the nail on the head in your latest book regarding titles vs leadership. Anyway, I am thankful for your insights and will continue to push onward in re-discovering what lies next fro me. The journey is always interesting, but it is the changing scenery that makes life exciting. I hope to have the pleasure of meeting you someday. David
Mark,
Thomas Merton, the Cistercian monk and author of The Seven Storey Mountain, said, “Monks are often happy, but never have a good time.” I’d prefer being happy and, every so often, having a really, really good time.
I wonder. If we focused more on being a good person and less on having a good time, would we be more likely to find life good and to have a good time?
Thanks for raising the question.
Chris
Mark, this observation hit home with me, especially the part about deepening relationships. As you know, I have three sons and a daughter….now, all in their 20’s. I have tried over their growing up years to spend special time with each of them on frequent occasions. We have taken some very special trips together over the years. As they have entered adulthood, I haven’t done so well unless they wanted to accompany me on the things I wanted to do………..but I have pursued my guy time and physical pursuits like running races etc. It struck me that I need to do better. So, a few days ago I sent each of my boys an email asking them to list three things/activities that they would like to do with me. All responded immediately which tells me something. Since two of my boys pursue surfing with a passion (yes, even in the winter), it looks like I am going to be trying to learn how to surf….even though the first time I tried years ago, it didn’t click for me. And there are several other things like elk hunting, spear fishing and so on that we will be doing.
You may wonder why I didn’t send the same email to my daughter? We just got back from an adventure filled week in Maui together. Her college graduation present. Made some wonderful memories.
I really enjoy your writing and treasure our long friendship.
Mark,
I wholeheartedly agree with the “experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him” statement. We will make mistakes and we will be disappointed by many people, even those that are “truly loyal” to us. But I firmly believe that how we finish is more important than how we begin. I have been teaching my son and daughter that regardless of how they start something and how successful they are in the beginning, it’s important to stay committed and finish strong.
I have been separated from my family for several months, but I recently had the pleasure of spending two weeks while they visited me. I had a great time playing one-on-one basketball with my son, giggling with my daughter, teaching them how to shoot pool, and chatting with my wife after putting the kids down. Although things are difficult for our family at the moment, I thank God for what we have and for the precious time I was able to spend with my family. Being thankful for what we do have and having a positive attitude regardless of the situation is the key to happiness for me.
Thank you for this forum and for your thought provoking entries.